From Diagnosis to Dreaming Again with Dr. Jennifer “Kaylene” Carter

For years Kaylene experienced many medical symptoms and illnesses. After a long journey, she was diagnosed with Complex PTSD. While in treatment she was able to link the medical challenges she had been faced with to the trauma from the abuse she endured as a child.

Today on the show, From Diagnosis to Dreaming Again with Dr. Jennifer “Kaylene” Carter, we share her courageous journey to heal from Complex PTSD, Fibromyalgia and overcome the hold it had on her life. She began dreaming again, wrote and published her first book and shares her journey with anyone that would like to overcome their own challenges in life.

Kaylene has a passion for poetry and songwriting. She is a singer and songwriter and is working as a Professor and Life Coach for entertainers. She is the author of the book: WHEN THE MIRROR SHATTERS, Breaking the Bondage of Performance Mentality.

Topics we cover in this interview:

  • Different types of abuse in relationships and resources to spot it
  • Strategies to heal from PTSD
  • Physical abuse as a child
  • How to live life on your own as a teenager

Kaylene was abused by her mother from a young age. A neighbour who was like a Grandma to her intervened and for a while, her Mother quit hitting her. Just after she turned 18 her Mother physically assaulted her in a horrific incident that she shares on the podcast interview. You can listen to here.

Before it got better it got worse. Kaylene experienced the loss of family support and the loss of her church family as people picked and chose sides. She tells us that she didn’t know how to spot the signs of abuse and had she been able to, she may have been able to experience healing sooner.

Due to living in captivity and being abused from a young age she experienced a lot of pain and dysfunction in her life. In her teens, she was diagnosed with  Fibromyalgia and in her 20’s PTSD. Some of the symptoms she experienced were:

  • reoccurring nightmares
  • visual flashbacks
  • blood sugar issues from her adrenaline being cranked up too high for so long.
  • back pain
  • headaches

After leaving home she had to support herself and took on jobs as a waitress. Kaylene put herself through school and accomplished her degree. It was a difficult path and opened her up to more abuse. She ended up in relationships that were toxic and didn’t even know until she began to learn about verbal and spiritual abuse.

Finding therapy was a challenge as medical insurance was not available through the jobs she was working. When she was able to find some help, she took the following methods:

Tools to Heal

  • facia release sessions -Trauma can be stored in your facia
  • music therapy
  • writing therapy
  • making self care a priority
  • going to a coffee shop
  • attending a concert
  • making a goal to live the healthiest life possible
  • using a schedule to manage medication
  • remembering to breathe, smile and laugh.
  • a 60 hour outpatient program
  • therapist
  • PTSD workbook

Q. How did you make the connection between your physical body and complex PTSD?

A. “Listen to your body.” She felt it in her body every day throughout her 20’s and 30’s. She used to feel like she was just being lonely at home and then she learned that trauma can be stored in your facia and be released.

Q. Do you celebrate your accomplishments or look for the next win?

A.  She used to look for the next destination but now she knows that more she trusts God and puts her faith in God, knows that God loves her for her and not her accomplishments, she can slow down and enjoy the journey, take time to celebrate.

Q. Tell us more about the book, what is your purpose of writing it?

A. “To give others hope.” She began writing to help others. She tells us it was like a form of therapy for herself and healing. She was able to see all the times that God intervened. Each time she reads her story she feels empowered and this is her hope, that others feel empowered, inspired and have hope for their journey.

Resources:

Nonprofits-

Links:

 

Bio:

Dr. Jennifer “Kaylene” Carter began working in the entertainment industry at the age of thirteen, alongside many up-and-coming stars in Orlando’s pop music scene. As a teenager, she transitioned from acting to singing. Kaylene recorded her first solo album (which she wrote and coproduced) during her senior year of high school. She also worked as a dancer and a runway model, making several appearances on both national and international television. A second solo album followed, which showcased her artistic versatility and style. Her career led her to creative projects in Los Angeles, Nashville, and New York City. Taking her love of lyric to the next level, Kaylene pursued advanced degrees in Creative Writing and Entertainment Business. Driven by her passion for poetry and songwriting, she is now working as a professor and life coach for entertainers.

Heal From The Ground Up with Michael Hsu

Many of us grow up feeling invisible or not good enough. Some of us are aware of it and others have yet to discover it. If we are faced with trauma or have parents that faced difficulties in coping in life, we may incorporate that in a negative way within ourselves.

If someone is feeling anxious, angry, sad or depressed can you intuitively feel and sense it? Today we talk about what it is like to be a highly sensitive person.

You may have a gift of high sensitivity. About 1/5 people are blessed with this gift. If they are not aware of this gift it can be used against them. Michael teaches them how to use this gift in a positive way.

Michael specializes in helping people heal anger, anxiety and depression from the ground up. He helps them get to the root of the problem and works with people that are highly sensitive.

What you will learn about from this interview

  • How to stop feeling responsible for others
  • Ways to identify when you are feeling someone else’s emotions vs. your own
  • How to honour what you need
  • How to speak up
  • Quit worrying about making others angry
  • How to know your true self
  • Speaking your needs respectfully
  • How to create an identity

His Journey

  • Michael shares his personal story of how his parent’s problems affected him in his adult life. His Mother experienced panic attacks and his father carried tension, (anger and emotional suppression).

 

Intergenerational Trauma

What happens when we take on the belief that we are not enough from others? We learn about how the hurt and trauma of our ancestors affect our daily lives. It is often at a subconscious level and Michael shares about how to discover how it affects you and what to do about it.

P.E.W.F Process

P.E.W.F is a healing model you can use anytime in your life. You can pick up his book to learn more: Here

P-    Problem that brings up the emotion

E –    Identify the Emotion

W – Worst case scenario

F –   Feeling about self

Two of the most common negative feelings about self are:

  • Failure
  • Non-existence

Michael has worked hard to consciously connect and understand what his parents were feeling. He was able to find his true identity and now helps others to free themselves from the ties of the past.

Listen to the podcast interview for the whole story:

If the player doesn’t work, you can click here: Podcast 

Michael’s Bio

In 2010, Michael Hsu started his private practice called Heal from the Ground Up, which targets the root of emotional, mental, and physical well-being so we can see life-lasting and transformative changes. As a professional life coach, holistic health practitioner and global love activist, he facilitates people in the process of unlocking their emotional power, heal their body from the ground up and shine their light onto the world. As such, everything he shares with you in his books comes from his own healing and transformation, which began with cultivating his emotional power. Ultimately, this gift that healed and empowered him emotionally, is the very gift he shares with you through his writing.

 

Links:

Finding Meaning with John Graham

Have you ever felt like something was missing deep within you? Many people try to fill that void with money, fame, drugs, and alcohol. John began life as an adventurer. He took on climbing mountains that have never again been climbed, was active in wars, revolutions and many thrill-seeking adventures that brought him near death a dozen times.

In the midst of a war, he had a light bulb moment and realized that all the thrill and adventure had not brought him meaning in life. He shares his story and journey of how he found the life of serving and helping others that he lives today.

Some areas of discussion:

  • Life as an adventurer
  • Taking enormous risks in the battle in Vietnam
  • Solving difficult public problems
  • Life in the Foreign Service
  • Life as a Diplomat
  • The power of story to change people
  • Creating a curriculum for students to provide the best service-learning free on the planet.
  • Realizing the fullness of who you are
  • Overcoming PTSD
  • Life’s moral compass in asking big questions such as: what will build justice, end pain?
  • Men struggling to find their feminine side

-Loving your kids is meaningful

-Playing catch, being a coach to your kid’s team, taking your grandkids for a while

-Being compassionate to someone that hates your guts

  • Finding what you’re meant to do
  • Creating meaning in your life that lasts

Links

Massive Dreams with Valerie Groth

The Ryan Banks Academy was a dream in Valerie’s Mind for many years before it became a reality for the 2018/2019 school year. She shares the story and mindset behind the school opening.

Valerie Groth was a Social Worker in the South side of Chicago and worked with awesome kids facing a lot of challenges. They had such tough environments that they self-harmed and tried to commit suicide.

She had the dream to create a boarding school that would provide a safe place for kids to receive an education for 11 years.  She had thought she would do it once she retired, perhaps when she had piles of cash lying around. Haha, she jokes with us as that is unlikely to happen.

A few events happened that caused her to begin now. She quit her job four years ago and began to make it a reality.

What happened in your mindset to take this from someday to today?

  1. She lost a student to gun violence. It was not the first, it was one she was close with and enough was enough.
  2. Valerie attended the World Domination Summit in Portland and Michael Hyatt was giving a speech. He told the audience that an actuary had told him that someone in the audience would die in the next 30 days.
  3. She had the realization that her dream was so big that no one else would know what to do, not Oprah, not the President, They Mayor didn’t have a blueprint so therefore it helped her to ask, Why can’t I do it. The bigger the plan is, the easier it was for her to see, it is never about the How, it is making the decision that you are going to do it.
  4. She made the realization that, “this is massive, audacious and requires sacrifice” and she made the decision every day to keep on moving forward.

Her dream is for it to be a boarding school in a few years. Today, they are operating with their first grade 7 class as a day school.

Talking about team

Valerie shares that there are two teams. The Ryan Banks Academy team and the team of people that support her personally. They helped her by coaching, advising and mentoring her along the way. The audio interview is available on Anchor: Here 

Links

Military Training Near Death Experience in Iraq

John served 13 months in Iraq, with the USA military. He had numerous near-death experiences. Today he shares the most prominent one with us, and the effects it had on him.

After his time in the army, he was able to find his passion and created EntrepreneurOnFire, a 7 day a week podcast. He interviews top and successful entrepreneurs and has was awarded Best Of iTunes in 2013.

From there, John and Kate created an amazing forum of podcasters from around the world, called Podcasers’ Paradise,  and were featured in Forbes magazine.

How To Podcast For Profit ($2M Sales In Year 2) With Entrepreneur On Fire John Dumas

I listened to an interview he did with Ryan Holiday about Stoicism. I have been touched by learning about it, and although I could go on and on about all the good that John is doing in the world, I will let you hear in this interview for yourself. What a truly inspiring and amazing person John is, but most importantly to me, he was my first mentor in the business world, and I wouldn’t have created the podcast without his guidance.

Stay tuned after and I will share a review and a few words with you.

 Near-Death Experience

John was deployed to Iraq for 13 months. In his platoon, 4 soldiers gave their lives in sacrifice, to defend the U.S.A, and bring freedom. John saw first hand, “freedom is not free.”

John had a sense of foreboding before his very near death experience. At about month 12.5 of his 13 month period in Iraq, he was sent for training. He had a bad feeling about it.  They were sent for training in a room, at a base, watching powerpoint slides for an hour, and he could have watched the information over skype from safety.

They had to travel two hours down a road, known as RPG alley. RPG stands for a rocket-powered grenade. They were going in a slow-moving convoy, which was very appealing to the Iraqi army.

John had to follow orders, and about halfway there, a massive explosion shook his Humvee, spun it around in a circle and blew the back-end off. The big convey truck behind, slammed into them at full speed, further damaging the vehicle. John had a big gash under his chin, the lieutenant next to him was basically unconscious.

It was an IED. improvised explosive deviceThe firing started and there were bullets flying everywhere.  They had to jump to another vehicle.  The lieutenant suffered a concision and had to be flown in a helicopter, all the way to Baghdad. Then his helicopter was fired at. He had a really messed up experience. This was all because one person high in command wanted to feel important, and forced everyone to attend this training in person.

rsz_john_shark_high_res

From this near-death experience,  the entrepreneurial seed was planted.  It never lost its grip, and years later, still with the same mindset, John has turned it into a good thing, and taken control of his own life.

They proceed as nothing happened and continued their training. John had a bandage placed on his chin, still bleeding and continued as if nothing happened. Then they took the slow trip back to the base, about 5 hours round trip.

DEALING WITH TRAUMA

There is no special training, but they try. The military thrives in war, battle, winning and taking the fight to the enemy.

It comes up short re-integrating soldiers into society and the civilian world. It comes up short giving the soldiers support getting through these traumatic experiences and having a normal life after and post-military.

John tells me it is not really the militaries job. Their job is to take the fight to the enemy and win. If they dedicate a lot of resources to other things, you might not win. If you don’t win then nothing else matters.

John tells me, “don’t begrudge the army, especially not the US army, for being the most powerful military in the world. There is a lot of reasons why the US military is the best and is great. The reality is you can’t be perfect at everything. Just like being an entrepreneur, you can’t be perfect at everything.

ENTREPRENEURS AND VIRTUAL ASSISTANTS 

John has learned, with things he struggles at or is weak at, to bring in virtual assistants or partners into the business that thrive in areas that he doesn’t. This can be valuable for all entrepreneurs.

AFTER EFFECTS AND INSIDE THE EXPERIENCE 

He was still employed by the military, still an officer for about a year and a half.  He never had any strange dreams at a conscious level. He had unexplained night sweats. For the first 6 months, he was back, he would wake up drenched in sweat. The bed would be soaked, so much so that he had to take a shower and change the sheets.

In hindsight, it is so obvious that it was all that stress and anxiety and death that he saw over the 13 months, that he had to push off to the side in order to survive and remain sane.

At the time, he wondered what was wrong with him, he thought he may be sick or have a disease because he was having terrible night sweats.

John tells everyone listening, “If you’re going through a similar experience, it is probably your body trying to burn off and get rid of that unbelievably pent-up anxiety.”

HOW JOHN FOUND THE PATH TO ADDING VALUE TO THE WORLD

John was a traditionalist for so long. He thought his route to happiness and success was high school, college, army, law school and then corporate finance. By the age of 28 he found out that these things weren’t bringing him success or happiness because he didn’t have any passion or inspiration for them.

He spent the next 4 years of his life, (from the ages of  28-32) really struggling and trying to find that passion or inspiration that would allow him to pour his enthusiasm into something. It didn’t come easily for him. It was 4 years of failing and struggling trying to find what that thing was for him.

He started to surround himself with the right podcasts, audiobooks, and right people and the right mentalities, where he did have his aha moment.

Since then, he has been able to pour his enthusiasm, passion and his fire into something that is completely his own, and that he is completely passionate about.

He feels very blessed to have found his aha moment. He would like to impart to anyone listening or reading this interview, that it is not easy to find your aha moment. It is not easy to find your passion.

“Don’t worry if you are struggling, that is part of the journey, just know that it is so worth the actual aha moment, that you want to continue the struggle. It is worth it.”

PRAISE AND GUIDANCE

I am so grateful to hear my mentor tell me that he feels I am creating a podcast that fills an important niche. (Blushing now)  He encouraged me to continue forward and take the next step.

This is an amazing benefit of podcasting. Here is some amazing advice about the next step, and you can use it too!

Create a tribe and creating a mastermind where people that are having these same experiences can come together and engage with each other. They can ask questions, give support, give advice, give guidance, share ideas and things that have worked as well as what didn’t work. That is how people are going to be able to grow and get past near-death experiences.

If John had something like this, he could have clung onto, back in 2004/2005 when he was really struggling with his near-death experience, it would have been amazing.

It is almost 10 years ago, and it is still easy for him to recall. It never goes away but it is really important for people who have just experienced it, to have a resource to go to.

You, fabulous listeners of our show, can take this advice in any niche, and apply it, and do it.

I shared with John, that when I was in the hospital with my heart issues, I couldn’t find any support groups on Google, and I could hear his voice, telling me I should start one.

That was his story with EntrepreneurOnFire. He wanted to fill the void, of needing a 7 day a week podcast, with new content to listen to.

SHORTCUT TO FIND YOUR PASSION

You need to work your creative muscle by doing this over and over again. It may not come the first few times, but keep on doing it over and over again, and you may be surprised by the results.

THE MORE

RESOURCES

The army did have a reintegration program. They were voluntary, and John never did go to them. At the time he was a decorated combat Veteran coming back from a year of war, and he felt invincible. He regrets not utilizing them and wishes he did.

If you are going through this, John encourages you to look around.  Go look at meetup.com,  if there are no groups in your area, create a meetup, if only one person shows up then it is a success, “You can create a tribe with one!!”

CONTACTS

Escaping Death with Christopher Hostetler

Could you imagine if your child was playing in the backyard, and the next thing you know, his friend has come to get you, to let you know he has been shot?

Imagine you are in the hospital wondering if he is going to be all right. How would this affect your family and how would this affect your child? Chris shares his experience for the first time on the radio, a story of hard times, strong family, healing and then a journey to help others.

You can listen to the audio interview on the Podcast: Here 

Chris was playing in his backyard when he was only 5 years old.  His life memories pretty much start the day of the accident. He was swinging on the swing set and playing with a friend.

His neighbour was a Vietnam Vet, perhaps having an episode, thinking his gun was unloaded and shot his gun. It was not unloaded, and it shot, ricocheted off a trailer hitch and hit Christopher.

Thankfully Christopher’s friend ran to get help and his Dad happened to be home. He was able to resuscitate him and get him to the hospital.

Listen to the show to hear the whole story, of how Christoper recovered, the pain he endured and then the life he created. Now he is able to help others and share his story.

Christopher Hostetler is an Integrative Health Coach. He can support you with counselling on nutrition, lifestyle, and mental and physical wellness. He tailors appropriate programs to fit YOUR lifestyle. You can find him to ask a question or see if his services are what you need at:

(Soul) Interview Overcoming Trauma with Gina Johnson

I was given the opportunity to share my story on, Author of Your Own Story, and for the first time spoke publicly about my experience being given the date rape drug and being raped when I was a teenager. It impacted my personal and professional relationships for nearly 20 years and until it came up, near the 20-minute mark of the interview, I hadn’t realized that I have healed from it.

Everyone has a story within them and as Doug Holt has put it, you can rewrite the narrative of yours anytime that you wish. I am working on doing that every day and I invite you to join me.

If you enjoy this interview please leave a comment and share it with anyone that you think would benefit. Thank you for being a part of the Synergy Community.

[SOUL] INTERVIEW | Overcoming Trauma with Gina Johnson

Orphans from Gun Violence and Healing with Angela True

Allow me to introduce Angela True. She is a  Mom of twin boys, a Non-Profit Executive Director, a Writing Coach, and world traveler. She has been a teacher, owned businesses and works with orphans helping them through loss and trauma.

Her Second Chance Story

Her darkest day felt like an atomic bomb was dropped in her living room as Angela found out her Father had been murdered. She was watching the evening news and noticed her fathers’ car in the background of the scene. A few hours later a sheriff came to tell them Father was murdered and shot several times, the killer was on the loose.

Her Mom had recently gone through a mental breakdown while suffering from Encephalitis and Meningitis and wasn’t in a place to care for her children. Angela and her brother went into state care and as well as the care of family members.

Angela was 16 and the responsibility of caring for her brother, caring for her Mom and raising herself was thrust upon her shoulders. Her Mom died 6 years later and by the time she was 22 she was parentless and felt like she had lost her way in the world.

Different types of Grief

Angela had the chance to say goodbye to her Mom and knew it was her time to go. When her father was taken from her, she didn’t have that opportunity to say goodbye or have closure and she tells us it is a different kind of grief.

When her Mother passed away, she experienced compound grief and it came at her in waves. She was laying in her college room and was so grief struck she felt like she was going to die. She couldn’t get up and physically couldn’t do it.

She pulled herself out by getting a psychodynamic therapist at her University. She tells us she found out that she had a  chemical depression and her brain was not making enough serotonin. The things that some people try such as a bath with candles was not enough to pull her out.

Angela saw her doctor and was put on medication for six months to a year. She told us that it is incredibly difficult to do it alone when you are in such a deep dark place and without that help, she would not be here today.

Listen to the whole interview to hear what she tells us about the benefits of using therapy and medication to heal.

The Turn Around Point

Let’s explore the steps Angela took along her healing journey.

  • She told herself the story that she was a victim for a very long time. She had tried counseling and other things yet still thought about her opportunity for revenge against the killer of her father.
  • Her defining moment was when she faced Gary, the man who murdered her father and confronted him. She told him he stole her parents’ lives and that she didn’t forgive him. She tells us that she was tired of holding on to the story and she took her power back. She decided that she was no longer going to be that girl who had a murdered parent, and she let go of that identity.
  • A few months later she became pregnant with twins.  She realized that she gained a lot of skills and that she was a survivor. Angela discovered the things that she loved and started to ask, how do I take all these things that happened to me and move forward? There are still moments she feels grief and cries yet she recognizes they are just feelings and can move past them.

What about you changed the most?

She had to be brave enough, to tell the truth from the tip of her toes and that is not easy when you have walked the walk-through trauma. She found radical self-love even though she didn’t have anyone to give that to her growing up.

 “You have to love and parent yourself if you lost your parents young.”

 There can be two truths, it can suck and it can be ok at the same time. She believes we never get over grief.

Exercise

Imagine you are holding two stones, one in each hand. One sucks and the other is great. You can carry both stones and still move forward. You can have 10 rocks as you are walking and still be ok, you can feel two things at the same time and still move forward.

What is one personal habit that contributed to your overcoming this?

  • Writing and reframing things plus therapy
  • She advised psychodynamic therapy and coaching if you experienced trauma. “If we don’t deal with our stuff it deals with us.” In ways that numb our pain such as drinking, addictions or other self-destructive habits.

One Resources That Helped You Out

What is one thing you are most passionate about today?

  • Advocacy
  • Love
  • Beauty

She is a part of Survivors for Power and helps survivors of gun violence.

If you found this interview helpful please let her know by sending her a quick message or sharing this on social media or with someone who you care about. She would love to connect with you if you are working through mother or father loss and you can find her at angelatruewriter.com

Links