Something to Live for with Rob Decker

How do you free yourself from the struggles and pains that started in the generations before you were born? What happens when a parent is not equipped with everything they need to parent well, and they are not able to learn the skills necessary? Our guest today shares his story of a difficult and dark start to life, followed by struggle nearly ending with suicide. He takes us on his journey where he found God, hope and healing. We will hear how he found forgiveness, love and freed himself from the chains of addiction and anger. Today Rob shares: How to Rebuild Your Life After Trying To Take It & Find Hope And Healing In Jesus.
Rob Decker: Husband, Father, Personal Fitness Trainer, Health Coach, Best Selling Author, Speaker. Rob has a beautiful wife that he has been married to for 5 years and a son with a baby on the way. He is sharing a difficult testimony to give others hope. Fitness and faith are a cornerstone for him today. Rob’s Testimony starts with his Mom. She had a difficult childhood that included: rape, abuse and neglect. She was thrown from foster home to foster home and was encouraged to have an abortion when she became pregnant with Rob. Being against abortion, she married the man that Rob knew as his Dad. Rob found out a little later that this man was not his Dad and was not allowed to use his last name. This created separation, strife and division between Rob and his sister. This man, referred to as his father, was an x military fighter in the military and his parenting style conflicted with his Mom’s. Rob witnessed a lot of violence, drug use and darkness. By the time he was a teenager, his Dad had left his Mom and everyone he loved was on Meth. This is an inspiring story and you won’t want to miss all of the details, you can listen on the Podcast: Here At the young age of 14 or 15 Rob began his journey of using and drinking. He experienced:
  • Being in a dozen fights
  • Having a shotgun pulled on him
  • Getting very verbal with people
  • Being evicted from his house
In Rob’s 20 he experienced a chain of bad relationships. If a relationship was good he sabotaged it himself. He met a man that preached about Jesus Christ and he was not yet open to hearing about him. In total survivor mode, Rob made poor choices that included selling drugs and becoming involved in a dangerous and destructive relationship. Rob was working out and at that time was the only positive thing he had done with his time. In the pain of another relationship ending, he accepted the offer to attend a bible study and accepted the Salvation offered through Jesus Christ. A Dark Night After his new found faith he ended up with the girl he had ended the relationship with. In a heated argument, he went downstairs and fell asleep. Rob woke to the Police banging on the door and she told him that she told the police he had raped and beat her. Rob’s emotions became too much to handle and he jumped out of the third story window. On the way down, his foot clipped an awning and changed the direction of his fall. Instead of dying, Rob found himself looking up, unable to move in a tremendous amount of pain. At this moment, Rob asked God why he let him live? His plan had not gone the way he had expected. In excruciating pain, Rob was arrested for rape and put under 24-hour surveillance. The officer told him he was a bad person right before she showed up at the hospital. Conversation With God After she was shown out of the hospital Rob had a conversation with God. He asked what was going to happen? In the moment of conversation, he was given great peace. He heard a voice that told him the charges would be dropped, the bills paid and that he would walk again. Rob dosed off into a dream of playing soccer. He woke up and the light, sounds and pain was all back. The charges were dropped and he was allowed to have guests. You can hear the whole story on the Podcast interview: Here What We Learn:
  • How his Mom responded when she visited
  • How he walked again
  • The forgiveness he found for others
  • Building a relationship with his Mom
  • Receiving a bill for $800K+.
Faith In Action While Rob was healing some Christian brothers from church picked him up and brought him to church back brace and all. He was broken and beaten and kept turning to God. Living with his Mom was not working as she was taking his pain meds and he ended up staying with friends. Rob went for long walks, read his bible and prayed a lot. He knew that God didn’t want him to continue to live off of Disability and despite the immense pain, he continued taking steps to heal For a couple of years, Rob lived out of a garage. He had been a Personal Trainer prior to the accident took a job at a gym for a short time. He was asked to train his bosses roommate and she became his wife. Quitting Drinking Rob’s wife was a big part of his ability to quit drinking. With God’s help and a nine-month battle, Rob quit drinking. Not before making a big mistake. Rob drove under the influence of alcohol and crashed her car. In the moments of difficulty, Rob negotiated with God and asked for his help. He agreed to move with her, marry her and quit drinking. God basically bailed Rob out of the situation and he quit drinking. What is amazing, he had no desire to drink again. They moved out to Colorado Springs and started a family. God opened some amazing doors for Rob and he began doing work that really helped people spiritually and emotionally. Faith and Fitness Rob brought his experience healing from a life of trauma and difficulty and his love of fitness together. He is now able to have deep conversations with people while helping them to strengthen their physical bodies at the same time. His wife and himself are creating a ministry in their garage. It is a place where people can feel safe to share their past and find forgiveness, fellowship and support. Rob can help them to :
  • Get off of drugs
  • Pray
  • Talk about God
  • Experience Fellowship
  • Do Pushups and Prayer
  • Do Jumping Jacks and Jesus
  • Find Faith, family and Fitness.
The whole interview is available for you to listen to 24/7
https://anchor.fm/synergymindsetcoaching/episodes/Something-To-Live-For-With-Rob-Decker-e45fo1
Favourite Book: The Holy Bible https://www.bible.com Links:

Finding Meaning with John Graham

Have you ever felt like something was missing deep within you? Many people try to fill that void with money, fame, drugs, and alcohol. John began life as an adventurer. He took on climbing mountains that have never again been climbed, was active in wars, revolutions and many thrill-seeking adventures that brought him near death a dozen times.

In the midst of a war, he had a light bulb moment and realized that all the thrill and adventure had not brought him meaning in life. He shares his story and journey of how he found the life of serving and helping others that he lives today.

Some areas of discussion:

  • Life as an adventurer
  • Taking enormous risks in the battle in Vietnam
  • Solving difficult public problems
  • Life in the Foreign Service
  • Life as a Diplomat
  • The power of story to change people
  • Creating a curriculum for students to provide the best service-learning free on the planet.
  • Realizing the fullness of who you are
  • Overcoming PTSD
  • Life’s moral compass in asking big questions such as: what will build justice, end pain?
  • Men struggling to find their feminine side

-Loving your kids is meaningful

-Playing catch, being a coach to your kid’s team, taking your grandkids for a while

-Being compassionate to someone that hates your guts

  • Finding what you’re meant to do
  • Creating meaning in your life that lasts

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Guest Post – 5 Common Misconceptions about Depression

2017-02-27 22:13:37

Depression is a negative force which takes over your mind and body, increases pessimism in your approach and virtually takes out the element of life from time and space. It’s a chronic condition that is widely misunderstood all around the globe. Depression can be fatal if it is not taken seriously. In this article, we will go through a few widely held misconceptions about this condition.

 

5 Common Misconceptions about Depression

1. It’s Simply a Mental Weakness

First and foremost, you have to understand that depression is not a sign of mental weakness. It’s not something to be ashamed of and it is definitely not something which you should hide from the world. It is a clinical disorder which has to be treated appropriately and in line with medical science. If you are suffering from depression, you should go and see a doctor and seek help from people around you as opposed to hiding it as if you chose to suffer from it.

2. It is a Permanent Disease

Depression is rarely a permanent condition and if you follow the right prescription, it can be treated. There is a common misconception that once you start taking the medicine for the treatment, you will keep taking it for the rest of your life. This is actually very rarely the case for the majority of people. If you take medicine and use professional medical advice at the right time and adhere to the treatment prescribed by your doctor, it can be improved sooner than you think.

3. It Will Just Go Away On Its Own

Another misconception with depression is that people think it is just a phase which will fade away with time – more like a passing cloud. You need to understand that it’s a serious condition which needs proper attention and treatment. If you are suffering from it, you have to follow the recommended treatment guidelines. Treat your early symptoms as the only way of preventing the condition from becoming overwhelming.

4. Prescribed Medication is the Only Cure

Of course, medicine is historically one of the best ways to treat depression but it is not the only one. Depression can be treated without medicine. It depends on the severity of the disease and your doctor. Your doctor will study the symptoms and if it can be treated with the help of some psychological intervention and physical exercise then they will suggest this instead. Normally when depression it is diagnosed in its early stages, it can be treated easily with the combination of psychological and physical activities.

5. It’s Because of Your Past or Childhood

It is widely believed that depression is an after effect of some terrible events in your past, this can be the case but in reality it isn’t the case for most people. Depression can hit a perfectly normal and healthy person who has had a happy past. It has nothing to do with your past; it can be anything in your day to day life. It could be something in your subconscious which is still untold. If you exhibit the symptoms, it is better to consult the medical experts. Proper treatment is the only cure for this disease.

Every disease should be treated following the guidelines of medical science. Depression needs positive intervention but first, it needs to be discussed and accepted. Most social segments do not accept it as a disease which forces its patients to hide it from them. The first step to overcoming it is being vocal and positive about it.

— Marcus regularly blogs at psysci , a psychology, science blog that examines the latest research and explains how findings can impact and improve people’s lives. psysci.co

psysci.co

 

This is a guest post from Marcus at psyci.co.  The opinions and information in this post are that of the author. Always seek medical help from a qualified professional before taking any information as advice and acting upon it.

Healing From Physical Abuse with Lori Jean Finnila

Healing From Physical Abuse by Creating Music

with Lori Jean Finnila

Imagine having seizures as a child from abuse at a young age, then being abused by the father of your child and suffering very physical injuries. The wonderful woman we interview today opens up and shares the hard truth of the abuse in her life.

Passionately driven by an intense love for her child,  she turns to other women’s horrifying stories of survival that end with great strength and inspiration!  She finds music and falls in love with creating it and singing, bringing herself closer to healing.

This interview is an incredible story of healing, single parenting and the courageous decision to go back to school.  She learns to screen-write, becomes a singer and songwriter and all while healing her brain injury and the scars of abuse that can only fade over time, becoming a memory far less than the joy that now fills its place.

Lori (1) resized

***********Trigger Warning************   This interview may contain content that could be disturbing to some viewers, viewers discretion is advised.

Physical Abuse and the Fight For Life

When Lori was young she suffered abuse that caused her to have seizures. She was very fragile.

Fast forward to her young adult years, and she lost her unborn daughter from Teen DV. Someone took her down with medication and she became involved with a man who had children.

Lori later had a son and grew into writing and created a radio show. She was running from abuse with a child.

Unfortunately, she suffered permanent neurological damage from trauma to her head as well as had her backbone separated from her muscle with about 2 1/2 feet of nerve damage down the side of her backbone.

She was fighting for her life, with her foot halfway in the door, halfway out. This was a huge turning point for her.

Healing Without The Hospital

Lori found her reality to be that she had to take her life into her own hands.  She tried to report the crimes, with no help coming from doing so. She was trying to keep the drugs away from her food, was threatened and found her home broken into.  She lived in fear of losing her son and took as much as she could for as long as she could.

She tried to reach out with well thought out plans. Her plans never worked and she learned not to reach out.  She dealt with the whole medical thing herself, no hospitals.

She went to a shelter for a while and ended up completely alone. There was no counselling or a place for her.  She left her son with a friend and ended up sleeping up on floors next to women that were traumatized on the street.

She knew she had to get back to her son, and when she made it, she would wake up screaming in pain. She knew she was losing the feeling to her body, and she would physically hit her body to stay present.

This went on for months and she was dying. She reached out to a coaching program and learned meditation. She listened to it in her ears non-stop. She felt she was the only one that could bring herself back, and she explained to her son she may not make it.

The Path to Healing

Lori found healing through hypnosis. She also did meditation, affirmation, took herbs such as ginseng, natural vitamins and found a love for music.

Music makes Lori light up with passion. Her son persuaded her to go back to school and she chose music. She started connecting and the music reached her brain. This path took her on a journey that helped her find self-love, belief, and creativity.

She ended up taking off and writing her first album, shortly after watching a play that really captured her interest. She was taken back and learned a whole new way to express herself artistically.

Mom’s Healing

Being a Mom can make healing extra challenging. I asked Lori for some advice for future Mom’s that will help them navigate healing and caring for their children.

Lori always put her child first and tells us that she would jump in front of a bus for him. (Perhaps, she tells us she is not the best to give advice here!)

She balanced keeping herself alive to be present for her son, with trying to heal and get better. Lori ended up running with her child and put his safety above her own recovery. Social Services knew she was injured and were watching her. This evoked a dance of healing and keeping her son from them. Her fear was if they took them, he would end up in a terrible situation and she would not have been able to help them.

I love that she took the initiative to try so many ways of healing for her son. She could have slept and remained on disability her entire life, yet she chose to do everything in her power to get out of the situation and create a life of healing, love her son and followed her passion.

Lori is working towards her degree and has recorded music that is now on Apple. Listen to the interview to hear all the details of how she made it happen.

Listen Here:

Thanks for reading this inspiring interview. Feel free to share this with someone you know that needs a little inspiration.

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